More Vacation Photos

OOC: We haven't been able to get together to game in a while, so I thought I'd tell more stories from Baladar's pre-adventuring days.

My parents were so happy when I graduated from the semiary that as a gift they sponsored my vacation before I'd have to settle down and lead a congregation. Through the judicious (and expensive) use of the Teleport Intercampaignia spell I was able to travel to some place called "Earth". I don't get what D20 Modern is, but these folks were wierd. They wore strange clothes and instead of horses they traveled in metal beasts through the land, sea, and air?! The food was wierd too, and the women....don't even get me started! I was glad to get back, and I did manage to bring back something called "souvenier photos". Kind of like honor tokens to show off stuff you did, but you need some magic item called a "camera" that makes little paintings.

Anyway, here are some of my paintings:
I stared out in some place called "America", but the locals called it a bunch of different names. I think some were for the village I was in and maybe the local province too. They did have this strong drink they made with smoked beans. I had a cup or three and before I knew it I felt like I had a potion of speed poured down my throat! After running around for a while someone pointed out to me that they had the wurld's largest ball of twine. I'm a sucker for these kind of things so away to the ball I went. Ok...been there, done that.

After the big ball I headed out west to the "Grand" Canyon. Actually it was pretty damned impressive. The thing went on and on and at the bottom was a river. I could've taken a donkey ride on some precarious trail down to the bottom, but they wouldn't convert my gold pieces into the local currency. The staff was pretty rude anyway, so I wasn't unhappy not giving them coins. I did want a closer look so I scaled down the side of the canyon at a spot that wasn't too grand. That's when I found out about the staff. The canyon had a bunch of care-takers in funny hats that yelled and yelled at me until I climbed back up. They were super pissed! A couple of the locals told me if I wanted a better look I could use some magic looking glasses they had just for that sort of thing. When you put in a coin they'd let you look through them for a small amount of time. That was the coolest thing about this part of my trip.

I was ready to depart for one of the other lands in this wurld when I heard about the Devils Tower in a land called Wyoming. I figured I could squeeze in a little work side-trip during my travels so I girded up my loins, grabbed my morning star and shield and ventured west to Wyoming to do battle. This would be my first test as a Cleric of Lathander! Of course when I get there not is all as it seems. Evidently this "Devil's Tower" is just some wierd shaped mountain. When I saw it I asked around some...just to make sure it wasn't really evil. Oh well.....time to move on anyway.

Before I left this land for the south I stopped by a mountain where the one wizard used Stone Shape spells to carve his leader's likeness into the hillside. Evidently these were great leaders in the past and the wizard dedicated his life to completing this work. I bet if you connect the gazes of these statues you would locate the entrance to his lair. Either that or maybe the whole mountain is actually a hidden dwarven dungeon. My efforts to get a party together to checkout these theroies didn't pan out. I was told that this land was very rich in gold though, so there might be some hope for a future foray.

I traveled south to a more tropical area of this land on the way to a place called, ironically enough, South America. I was getting a little tired of my travels and thought I'd take in some solo adventuring. I asked around a every inn I could find and got quite a few good tips. There weren't any old wizards offering me money to help find some items and I never did come across a village needing some adventurers to save them. In the end I needed to do some good old-fashioned dungeon crawls. Some explorers discovered some ruins in a place called Central America. These ruins were so old that the jungle has reclaimed the land until quite recently.

When I got there it was hot and humid and the place was crawling with people. I thought maybe this place had been pretty much picked over with all the traffic, but these pilgrims, called "tourists" didn't seem to care about the riches that might lie below the surface of the ground. They just climbed over everything and took some of their magic paintings. It took forever to find an entrance to the caverns below and when I did I found a group of people had in fact claimed this dungeon site. They called themselves Arkeeologists and they weren't interested in obtaining my services. I was postive they had a legitimate legal claim on this site because they weren't afraid to call in the authorities. I bid my farwell and went on to the next site as fast as I could.

At the southern portion of this land I found another set of ruins far up in the mountains. There were very few people, probably because it was such an arduous trek to get here. The air was thin and cold. This place was obviously an abandoned Dwarven settlement. The stonework was so fine your couldn't even try to slip a knife blade between the joints, even after centuries of neglect. I know there has to be some good loot in the dungeons below, but being by myself really posed some insurmountable problems. I really needed a party with at least two good thieves in it because you know there are going to be a lot of deadly traps. Oh well, yet another place to come back to when I am able....if I am able. With the great expense of getting here, the hual would have to be pretty darned good!

I heard of a rich kingdom across the sea that was simply rich in gold and treasure. Of course I did also hear that most of the good stuff had already been found, but the tombs themselves were still worth going to sea. These people also worshiped the sun, so they couldn't be too bad right? I was a great visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. Hot and dry, this land was a big desert. I got sand in places I never wanted it. Travel tip: don't wear metal armor in the desert. I think some of the links branded a nice design in the back of my next. Those Cure All spells aren't cheap!

My next stop was at the ruins of yet another ancient civiliation. This place was an old gladitoial arena. I'm told that this place was the biggest arena this wurld ever had to offer. The could flood it with water to have sea battles and they imported savage creatures from around the wurld to fight. I bet if I could come back I could convince Samson to come back with me if only to check out this place. This was my favorite place in this country, although they did have a lot of churches. Oh, get this...here they had a small country within this country that is totally owned by a church! An entire country named Vatican City, owned by a single church. Must have some very, very rich parishioners!

I did stop by another place in this country that had a famous leaning tower. You don't get a great view of it from this angle, but the tower does lean quite a bit. I think it's the headmaster's quarters from what appears to be a wizard's school. I really didn't have much time to hang out here, which is ok by me.

My next stop was a land called France which reminded me more of home. The people and food were a bit on the ripe side, rude to foriegners, and there were lots of old churches, and catacombs to discover. I was enticed to check out a place billed as the "Happiest place on earth". Bull! All this place wanted was my coin and I was a bit PO'd to find out that America had two of these places! How can there be more than one "happiest place"? I was in and out of this place in a hurry.

Several people told me I needed to check out this big tower they had in the capitol of this land. I'd seen enough towers but I figure what the heck....I'm glad I stopped. This thing was HUGE and made of metal. I couldn't tell if it was Dwarven or Gnomish manufacture, but it was magnificent. I asked this one guy resting in the tower's shadow if he'd take my painting. Please note the colorful footwear he was wearing. This kind of stuff was quite popular.

Across the channel from the main continent is a big island that I'm told pretty much ruled the wurld a couple hundred years ago. I'm not sure if these folks were responsible to all of the ruins I've been to or not, but I thought I sould make my visit short and respectful. Here is a building that the land's leaders meet in. They also have a tower, but this one has a big timepiece called a "clock". Eveidently clocks are so special that they are given names in this land. This one is called Big Ben. Ben is really loud an he actually calls out the time for all the land to hear. It was quite impressive.

My final stop before going home was a little place in the countryside where a large tent was set up for all the locals to come for entertainment. There were animals and performers on display in three seperate arenas and a side attraction called a "freak show". The freak show is a tale for another time.

I'd like to thank my loving parents for such a wonderful graduation gift. I got to learn a lot about new cultures and really got a chance to explore. I could get used to traveling......